In your dreams of vacation do you envision universal goals such as conservation of resources of our planet and its energy independence – or less stress? For many baby boomers, this time of year tends to be exhausting rather than inspiring.
Stress is the body’s response to a stimulus, external or internal, which is seen as proof of personal resources. Is a gift to give your source of stress, as you locate the perfect tie or worry that a better BlackBerry will be available next week? Food becomes your comfort and a challenge as you eat cookie dough instead of cook? Will you be focusing on the buffet table, rather than chatting to the annual festival of office? You may create more stress by sticking to the old routine and operating on autopilot.
Beware of symptoms of stress. They can occur at any time, in multiple forms and varied. For example, they may be:
physiological headache – stomach
Emotional – feeling angry, overwhelmed
Behavior – overeating, physical removal
Cognitive – difficulty concentrating, memory loss
Of course, you do not want to feel anxious and restless, especially during this season. We know that your goal is to maintain balance in your life and still honor the complexity of Christmas / Hanukah / Kwanzaa. Think about what the holiday is most important to you. Think about what you want to do is not what you have to do.
Begin to lay the foundations for a gradual change in your ritual gifts. Use the eight tips to help you keep your stress levels in check, as you focus on fewer things and more joy
1. Give the gift of reconnection. Send a card and catch up with an old friend or family member with whom you have lost contact.
2. Investing time instead of money. Take your elderly neighbor to the doctor’s appointment or the grocery store.
3. Give the gift of yourself. Organize a regular meal or the date of the museum with your parents or take them to the cinema.
4. Get your friends to invite them to a potluck dinner and to further reduce the expenditure by limiting your gift exchange.
5. Add a personal touch and express yourself creatively by a little of your own presents.
6. Focusing on others – volunteers at the soup kitchen, taking gifts to a homeless shelter, or donate to a battered women’s center.
7. Give a gift for you. Go with your spouse for the weekend or take your grandchildren to the zoo.
8. Enjoy the peace of mind by paying your debts instead of inviting the family to exit expensive. Look through the eyes of your children and decide together how to spend the day. Your family will understand and pass the experience.
Let go of the idea of the perfect holiday. It may not look like a Norman Rockwell painting, but these small changes may represent the beginning of a new chapter in your life. Take heart as you embrace and celebrate this moment. Use it as a model for the future. And joy to you and yours as you journey towards greater connection.
(C) The center of Mentor, 2006
Posts Tagged ‘Holiday’
How the Gift of Connection Can Help Baby Boomers Reduce Holiday Stress
Saturday, July 10th, 20105 Easy, On-the-go Holiday Stress Relief Tips
Thursday, April 15th, 2010It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Andy Williams must have had someone doing all his shopping, baking, decorating, wrapping and social commitments for him. Our patience can run pretty thin during this crazy time of the year.
It is sometimes hard to find the joy of the season. As you are going about your holiday preparations, try these five easy, on-the-go stress relief tips. They are as easy as using your five senses.
1. Experience holiday music. Really experience it. As you are doing your holiday shopping, listen to the music playing in the mall, shops and markets. Hopefully, it won’t be “Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer. ” Music can be one of the best stress relievers. How can one not be soothed by the voices of Nat King Cole or Bing Crosby? Music can also conjure up the Christmas joys that were more prevalent when we were children. And better yet, sing along to the songs that you know. It doesn’t matter if you know all the words. You can always hum instead.
2. Enjoy the beauty of holiday decorations. Lights, trees, ornaments, wreaths and even the giant blow-up Santa Clauses on suburban lawns are all the visual treats of the holidays. When someone decorates their house or business for the holidays, it is a gift for all visitors and passersby to enjoy. So, do enjoy. Let the sparkling lights, dazzling ornaments, festive trees and blow-up Santa Clauses bring a smile to your face.
3. Feel the warmth of physical contact. People are naturally more affectionate during the holidays. We get holiday hugs from friends, family and coworkers. Hand shakes and good wishes are exchanged by everyone. Even for foes, the holidays bring out commonality as opposed to differences, embraces instead of bitterness. We get a handshake and a smile from our boss when all year we are ignored. Instead of being resentful about it, appreciate it. Thinking and expressing good cheer towards others will decrease your stress level tremendously. So, the next time you are at the market, put your arm around the bagger and wish him or he happy holidays.
4. Take in soothing aromas. The scents of the holidays are all around us. We cannot escape the pine fragrance of Christmas trees or the spicy smell of gingerbread cookies this time of year. Bayberry or cinnamon candles are other scents of the season. Researchers have found that certain aromas trigger our memories to surface. Perhaps the smell of fresh baked cookies reminds you of a pleasant childhood memory. Breathe in (deeply) those scents and let them take you away to your happy memories.
5. Taste the gift of seasonal delicacies. This stress relief tip is perhaps the easiest to use. There is no doubt that a huge part of the holidays is enjoying food. Yes, we will gain a few pounds. But, can you think of the holidays without getting together with family, friends, coworkers and feasting on holiday goodies? Many shops, businesses and your workplace are usually filled with treats to grab while going about your tasks. You may also receive a gift of food whether it be sweets, nuts or a bottle of wine from a friend or coworker. Savor the flavors and let them fill you with gratitude. Be grateful that you have more than enough food to enjoy and friends and family who care about you.
These holiday stress relief tips are all based on being mindful of the beauty of the season. You don’t have to do or have anything special to use them. You do have to slow down, be present and change your perspective. Use your mind and senses to destress and find joy. The holiday season will be over quickly, take advantage of the radiance and good cheer all around you.
All Inclusive Holidays = Stress-free Holiday
Saturday, April 3rd, 2010For a real break from the stresses of life at home and work, give you and your family a fun-filled holiday by booking all inclusive. With virtually everything paid for up front it’s up to you to enjoy yourself to the full!
The beauty of all inclusive holidays is that the only thing you have to worry about is having the best time you possible can! You can relax and enjoy yourselves without having to worry about the final bill.
There are plenty of all inclusive holidays available in many of the best resorts around the world, at prices to suit all budgets. It’s not just five and four star hotels, but cheap holiday destinations as well, that can make an all inclusive holiday bargain. These are a perfect way to take the family on holiday and not worry about how much you’re all spending!
As far as food is concerned your breakfast, lunch and dinner are included in all inclusive holidays. Some hotels even include daytime snacks and afternoon tea. Meals include a variety of international and local dishes and are usually in a buffet-style.
We all like a drink on holiday and, although no one would recommend drinking to excess, all inclusive holidays give you unlimited house wine, draught beer, local spirits and soft drinks all day and night. You should note that international beer and spirits are not usually included.
It may be tempting to eat too much, but you can ease your conscience by taking part in a range of sporting activities on many all inclusive holidays. You may be an old-hand or a novice but you can try tennis, volleyball and possibly water sports such as sailing, windsurfing or diving. Some activities may need a small payment for equipment hire.
Part of the fun experience of the best holidays is the entertainment. On an all inclusive holiday, there is usually entertainment inside the hotel or resort – day and night. These can vary from discos to cabaret, and games to live music.
For a real break from the trials of day to day life, give yourself a stress-free holiday by booking all inclusive. Then, forget about your wallet, it’s up to you. Go and enjoy yourself to the full!
Stress Free Holiday Traveling
Thursday, March 25th, 2010The holiday season is upon us, and the whole family soon will be together. Traveling isn’t always as easy as you expect, from trip-planning to luggage-lugging and long flights. Take a deep breath, it can be easy.
To lessen the hassle of pass trip-planning and to prepare your self for some of the surprises you may face along the way. Here are a few tips to save the day:
Now that’s stress-free travel planning. Happy Holidays!
10 Meal Planning Tips For Stress-Free Holiday Meals
Saturday, March 13th, 2010When it comes to hosting holiday parties and family events, it is important to plan ahead and come up with a game plan several weeks before the big day or event.Here are 10 important tips to help you enjoy a stress-free holiday party.1. When hosting family gatherings, we tend to over invite guests. Keep your guest list manageable and only invite the amount of people that you feel you can handle. Inviting too many guests will cause over-crowding and unnecessary stress.2. There is nothing wrong with asking others to help out by bringing a dish, dinner supplies or even showing up early or staying an hour late to help you prep or clean up after the meal.3. Keep your decorations and decor simple. You don’t need to go all out and decorate every nook and cranny of your home or entertaining space.4. Clean your home and entertaining space a week in advance. Then the day before the gathering, go back in and just do some light cleaning.5. Plan your menu weeks in advance. You can precook or bake a lot of your foods and freeze them for the big day. Just thaw the day before and reheat on party day. If you don’t have time to cook and bake, consider a fully catered or partially catered meal.6. Two weeks before the holiday gathering, draft up a supplies list. Make sure you will have enough dinner plates, bowls, serving utensils, silverware, tablecloths, chairs, etc. If you don’t have enough, there is nothing wrong with asking some of your guests to bring their supplies along. 7. Make clean up a snap by loading your dishwasher or washing dirty dishes, pots and pans as you go along. After a big meal, the last thing you want to do is spend hours in your kitchen cleaning up.8. Ask your spouse and children to help you prepare for the family gathering. They are quite capable of cleaning the house, setting up tables and chairs and decorating, which will free you up to do the more important part…cooking and baking for your guests.9. I like to over cook and have an abundance of food for my guests. It is better to have extra food than not have enough. Go to your local discount store and purchase several plastic food storage containers and you can send home leftovers with your party guests.10. If you are serving alcoholic beverages, don’t over do it. Only purchase and serve enough alcoholic beverages for each guest to have two drinks. By limiting what is on hand, you won’t have to worry about intoxicated guests driving home. Make sure you have plenty of bagged ice on hand for serving beverages.By planning out your holiday meal in advance, you can cut down on pre-party stress and anxiety. Take your time, make your lists and don’t be afraid to ask for help from family and friends. You want your holiday party to be as stress-free and as enjoyable as possible.
Holiday Stress Relief – Ebenezer Scrooge Found The Secret
Saturday, February 27th, 2010Holiday stress is as much a part of the Christmas season today as shopping, and we search for the secret to stress-free holidays as frantically as we hunt for shopping bargains. So why not look to the character most often credited with changing his own experience of Christmas–Ebenezer Scrooge?
Scrooge had so many Christmas issues to overcome, it took nighttime visits from three spirits before he got the message about how to celebrate the holiday. But he learned his lesson well. After that night, Scrooge was a changed man when it came to Christmas. In Dickens’ words, “… it was always said of him, that he knew how to keep Christmas well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge. May that be truly said of us, and all of us!”
“I wonder if that can be said of me. Can it be said of you?” I asked my friend.
“Who knows what that even means, keeping Christmas well. Scrooge lived in a much simpler time. All he did was send a big turkey to Bob Cratchit’s family, play games at his nephew’s house, and raise Cratchit’s wages and help him with some medical bills.” My friend sounded exasperated. “Today we have excessive commercialism, too many parties, fattening food everywhere while we’re continually warned about being overweight, long lines to get the special toy our kids can’t live without, and hundreds of articles about holiday stress. Scrooge might find Christmas more of a challenge in 2006 than he did in the 1840s.”
“What do you think he’d make of all the tips on how to avoid holiday stress?” I mused. “You know-don’t try to do it all, skip the parties you don’t want to go to, make lists before you shop and cut back on spending, don’t eat too much, don’t drink too much, don’t expect too much, exercise, take relaxation breaks-stuff like that.”
“He’d call it humbug,” my friend replied. “But, like I said, he lived in a simpler time. Plus he was rich, so once he decided to be generous he could give as much as he wanted without worrying about paying off credit card bills for months like most of us today. And he was starting from nowhere, so people were thrilled with whatever he did. It’s not like they were comparing his gifts to the ones he gave last year or the ones his brother gave. I don’t get where you’re going with this.”
“I’m wondering whether we’re off on the wrong path with all the tips to banish holiday stress,” I said. “Every year more articles come out. I did a Google search on reducing holiday stress the other day and got over 78,000 hits. All the experts say we’re overwhelmed and they offer advice, but it doesn’t look like it’s working. Maybe we need to find a new approach.”
“I can’t believe you’re saying this,” my friend said. “You’ve been teaching stress-management for over 20 years, and now you’re saying it doesn’t work?”
“Oh it works for your life overall if you regularly use techniques like meditation, yoga, physical exercise, deep muscle relaxation, and time-management,” I said. “But those are long-term. We’re talking about the Christmas season here. It’s only a few weeks long. Realistically most people aren’t going to start some new technique like meditation in the middle of the Christmas season when they’re already complaining that they don’t have enough time. And little hints like setting priorities and taking time for yourself are way too general to have much impact.”
“So we’re all doomed to live with Christmas stress unless we can time travel back to Scrooge’s day when life was simple? Not a very helpful conclusion,” my friend said.
“No, not doomed,” I said. “Just misguided. Instead of reading through endless lists of ways to reduce Christmas stress, maybe we should take a lesson from Scrooge’s experience and focus on keeping Christmas well. Just step back, look around and enjoy what is out there. Look–here’s how Dickens describes what Scrooge did on that Christmas day after the spirits had visited him.”He went to church, and walked about the streets, and watched the people hurrying to and fro, and patted children on the head, and questioned beggars, and looked down into the kitchens of houses, and up to the windows, and found that everything could yield him pleasure. He had never dreamed that any walk — that anything — could give him so much happiness.
“You’re way oversimplifying the issue,” my friend argued. “I’m reminding you again that we live in a more complex time. We can’t just go wandering around patting unknown children on the head and peering into other people’s kitchen windows. And even if we did, I don’t think we’d find it nearly as satisfying as he did.”
“Duh! It’s a metaphor,” I responded. “Expand your awareness. Live in the moment. Enjoy the small daily pleasures. Be a good person. Help someone out. Maybe that’s enough. Christmas is a holiday. It’s supposed to be a happy time, not an endurance test. So let yourself enjoy Christmas with whatever you have, whoever you’re with, wherever you are. Maybe it’s that simple.”
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5 Ways to Have a Wonderful Stress Free Holiday Season
Saturday, February 20th, 2010It’s that time of year again! Christmas is just around the corner and many people are already beginning to gear up for the frenzied shopping, the eternal parties, the organizing of gifts and of course the trolley-loads of food. It is an extremely busy time of year for many and it is not surprising that people often end up feeling stressed out emotionally, physically, and financially.
If you spend just a few minutes watching the television it is easy to become sucked into the ever-growing list of things to do, places to go and gifts to buy over the holidays. It is possible that you may begin to feel pressured into going overboard with your Christmas purchases, especially when you see the truckloads of furniture and appliances arriving daily at the homes of friends and neighbors or when your kids put in their order for the gifts they want because “everyone at school” is getting them.
Christmas can sometimes feel like the most stressful time of the year, but it certainly does not have to be that way. There are a few things that you can do make the holiday season what it should be…full happiness, peace and love.
Get Organized The first thing to do in order to ensure a smooth and stress free holiday season is to get organized. When you are running around haphazardly it is likely that you will forget essential items, purchase things that you do not really need and end up grossly overspending. So to make sure that you only spend money on the things that matter start by writing a gift list; write down the names of the people that you truly want to buy gifts for. Not the people that you think you should buy for, but those that you truly appreciate and want to show your love too.
Next decide upon a budget; make a commitment to yourself to only spend the amount decided upon and stick to it no matter what. Then, speak to the adults on your list and ask them if there were anything in particular they would like for Christmas. Often we tend to think that the people we care about must have huge elaborate gifts but you will find that often people have simple little things in mind that they would like to have so you can end up saving a great deal of money as well as time by asking a question.
This of course does not apply to children because they tend to think big! (Smiley face)
Set Out EarlyHave you heard the old saying “the early bird catches the worm?” Well that saying is especially true during the holiday season. If you have ever been caught still doing last minute shopping on Christmas Eve, you understand the true meaning of the word torture. To ensure a stress free holiday you definitely want to get all of your shopping out of the way early. If you have your list ready, your budget organized and an idea for potential gift for your friends and family, then the beginning of December is a great time to set off to get your presents out of the way, this will leave you plenty of time to organize your food shopping later on.
Be ModerateNo man/woman is an island and you cannot be all things to all people. It is likely that you will receive many invitations to many homes and many events during the holidays, and you may feel compelled to accept all of the invitations you receive because you may not wish to offend anyone or “leave anyone out.” This is one of many reasons why people ending the holiday season feeling completely drained of energy. They are partying here, drinking there, eating here, there and everywhere. Doing so is not only physically draining but it also the reason why so many people begin the New Year with a weight loss resolution.
Be moderate over the holiday season, pace yourself and only accept a reasonable amount of invitations. That way you will feel energetic and able to have more fun at each event, and more importantly you will not end the year feeling guilty about overdoing things.
Relax and Enjoy ItIf you have a large family gathering at Christmas you will most likely be very busy organizing the big day. There will be presents and food to buy, family to organize, invitations to send out, the house to decorate and maybe even people to pick up from the airport. This entire event can be very tiring and time consuming. Have you ever organized a family Christmas and found yourself so busy making sure that everything went smoothly that the time went by in a flash and when it was all over you realized that you did not even get a chance to really enjoy yourself? It is easily done; so if you want a stress free Christmas then try to remember that you are supposed to be enjoying it.
Only take on what you are comfortable doing. If you feel at ease having 10 people over for Christmas lunch then do not let anyone pressure you into entertaining more than that. Try to stay focused on the moment. Enjoy each step of your planning and get involved with everyone on the day, so that when you look back at the holidays you can say that you remember every part of it and you enjoyed yourself thoroughly.
Remember The True MeaningChristmas is not really about presents, turkey and ham or getting your first kiss under the mistletoe. It is really about love and appreciation! Some view Christmas as a time of remembrance and to celebrate the birth of Jesus, but for many Christmas is a time to share love for, and show appreciation too loved ones. Some argue that the true meaning of Christmas has been forgotten and commercialism has taken over, but what ever your views or beliefs the holiday season comes around just once a year so why not spend that time around the ones you love and make a special effort to let them know how important they are to you and that you love and cherish them always.
By following the steps above, getting yourself organized and not over doing things, “the most wonderful time of the year” can be a joyous, loving, sharing, stress-free experience, one that will be remembered and thought of with fondness well into the New Year.
Make Your Holidays Stress-free: 4 Ways to De-hustle and De-bustle Your Holiday Season
Wednesday, February 3rd, 2010Most women lead very busy lives, yet we still expect to create the perfect holiday scenario for our families. The holiday responsibilities-decorating, cooking, baking, wrapping the gifts, sending cards, entertaining and much, much more-still tend to end up on our to-do lists.
Unfortunately, that means that many of us will find ourselves feeling stressed during what is supposed to be a festive and joyous time of the year. As women, we often set the tone during the holidays for the entire family. If we’re feeling stress or pressure, others in our family will begin to feel that tension also.
With that in mind, it is important we take the initiative to make the holiday season more peaceful- for ourselves and our families. Here are a few ideas:
· Plan ahead-and reevaluate: The holiday season puts even more stress and pressure on us if we don’t take the time to plan. Sit down and make a list of the things you must do. Then-and this is important-reevaluate your to-do list with a critical eye. Find out what activities and traditions are important to you and your family, and what everyone agrees could be let go. It is critical for all of us to revaluate and to realize that it’s OK to simply let go of some things.
· Don’t do it alone: Many hands make light work. Why not enlist some help? Involve your family in the holiday tasks at hand or hire a teenager in your neighborhood. Things like putting the stamps on your cards, baking cookies, wrapping gifts are easily delegated tasks that don’t need to be done by you. Use your neighborhood and grocery store services for things like flowers, baked goods, hors d’ouevres, and more.
· Take time for yourself: Avoid the temptation to exhaust yourself trying to cross every last item off your to-do list. Remind yourself that, even during the busy holiday season, it’s OK to make time to do nothing-in fact, it’s good for you! Be still. Read a book, enjoy a bubble bath. Put on some relaxing music and have a cup of tea. Indulge in a massage or a pedicure. Whatever you do to relax, remember to keep it up during the holidays.
· Maintain your health: It’s no secret that stress can have a negative impact on your health. Staying healthy will make it much easier to enjoy the holidays. Most of us indulge in more than we should during the holidays-whether its food, drink or sweets-we need to strive to maintain a balanced diet and some regular exercise. It is also important to not let our obligations keep us from getting enough sleep. A good night’s sleep will help you maintain your energy level and a positive attitude.
It’s hard to avoid being busier than usual during the holidays. This year why not take a few moments to de-hustle and de-bustle your holiday season. Make the time and take the time to enjoy a stress-free holiday season!
Copyright 2008/2009
Are you looking for Easy Elegance? Want to add a touch of romance to your holidays? For many more inspirational tips and ideas for adding elegance and romance to your holidays visit www.kathleenellis.blogspot.com and www.thecasualelegantlife.comHappy Holidays!
